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Nothing Really Matters

July 11th, 2006 by epoyz

"Oh please, let it rain today

This city is so filthy, like my mind in ways

Oh, was a time, like a clean, new taste

Smiling eyes before me, inches from my face

Wash my love
Wash my love
Wash my love.."

               - "Wash", Pearl Jam from Ten

I finally got to finish all the episodes of Seinfeld that i stole from the net (well, they WERE giving it away, so..) and the finale just struck me hard because of what i have been reading lately in the news. in the 2-episode finale, jerry and the gang were arrested and jailed in massachusettes for violating the Good Samaritan Act, when they didn’t lift a finger to help a fat dude who was being carjacked, choosing instead to ridicule him because, well, they were from new york. that shit was just hilarious to them. it was really cool and funny that the show about nothing ended its run with a story about them being jailed for doing nothing. heyhey.

ahhh, doing nothing. there was a time in my life when i didn’t have to think about stuff, and how i miss those days terribly. now it’s like pieces of broken glass are trying to rip into my brain every single day because i see shit, i process shit (that’s nasty..) and i feel that i have to have a say about shit. the ignorance, the bliss of childhood and the stupidity of youth don’t bail me out anymore, and i never thought growing a conscience could be so painful..

i have to give props to someone i admire very much, though i’ve only known of his work for only a year: mr. conrado de quiros. i link to his columns all the time, and i read his stuff everytime he posts something in the inquirer website. and dammit, this man is a dynamo. he never stops writing about stuff. he’s just relentless, tireless, fully committed to his cause, churning out beautiful intelligent shit at an astounding rate that really make me think of not becoming a writer. well, you know, because dude is so good you just know you won’t be able to measure up so why bother? kinda like watching lebron james: you no longer want to ball after seeing that high quality of play and it just makes you content you are witnessing the whole thing.

but i digress: this man is a gift to our troubled country, and a lot of us don’t realize it (because of obvious reasons, one of which is that we can’t find the time to listen and process shit anymore ..). and a lot of us probably won’t notice what he’s doing until someone kills him. and man, the way he’s been writing lately, i believe he’s going for just that. when i read his column it’s like i’m reading his death wish, yo.

amidst all the political killings of rebels and journalists "rocking" our nation nowadays, sir conrad is just plain out waging war. well you’ve read some of his stuff, but check out a few of his latest: his most recent piece is hilarious (except the rape stuff, i’m guessing he didn’t mean it to come out that way..), about how to get out of trouble when the government goes after you. it may appear that he’s just making kontra everything that the government throws out there ( hey, if they’re being this stupid you’d be opposing anything that comes out of their craphole, too. dropping 500 cases against imelda in exchange for $5-$10 billion… i’ll give you fuckers $10 billion to crawl up your own asses and die, you whores. except i don’t have the money. $10 dollars siguro..), but si-raul-o gonzalez keeps talking shit, so sir conrad will just keep striking back. i completely agree with him on this one about the comelec: jail the fuckers.

come on, if they "didn’t mean it", that don’t mean they shouldn’t be held accountable, right? these officials destroyed us, dude. kung ordinary citizen ka, and let’s say "in an act of faith", you end up getting a few people screwed out of their money (like my childhood buddy who got involved in the pyramid scam shit a few years ago..) and you end up having a hand in "destroying" their lives, you WILL be jailed for it, right? especially if you can’t give them their money back, di ba? now how different is that from what happened with these officials? ang siste, kung appointed ka pala ni "presidente", you can screw up 80-something million lives and all you’ll get is a slap in the hand. o ha?

my friend is still in jail, and that is for trying to help people earn a lot of money. he didn’t bail out when his foreign investors/swindlers ran away, he stayed and faced the music. eh si garci? si mikey? yang mga hayup na yan.. you see? hindi na talaga tayo pantay-pantay sa pilipinas, the set of laws that govern us ordinary folk do not apply to the other fuck-ups.

back to sir conrad: if this piece he wrote about rizal and ate glue isn’t a challenge to have the government hitmen to go after him, i don’t know what is.. hehe..

but this one is a bit heavy, because now he’s just branding everybody as criminals. damn. 

which brings us back full circle to Seinfeld and the Good Samaritan Act. most of us are doing nothing, and it’s become too dangerous for everybody. you could argue that we’re already in jail, practically, but come on. when are we going to do something about all this? now that it’s gotten this worse, we’re becoming as guilty as the fuckers we detest. this shit’s gotten too crazy now that jackie chiles would surely say: this is preposterous, ridiculous, ludicrous, outrageous..monstrous!

reading that piece got me to thinking: am i guilty on some level for just nodding my head to everything he says and not actually doing anything about it? but what can i do, really? you can’t say the same for him, though, because after all, i believe he IS trying to get himself killed. and that is definitely something, yo.

dammit, he beat me to it.. idol ko pa naman si ninoy.. yun nga lang, ngayon, medyo the filipino is not worth dying for. saklap, di ba? i guess worth it pa rin.. di lang halata..

kaya ayan.. kapapanood ko lang ng United 93 kanina.. pwede natin sila gayahin. pag na-realize na natin na mamamatay na rin lang tayo, aba’y sugurin na natin yang mga punyetang nasa gobyerno, bago nila idamay mga mahal natin sa buhay.

okeyokey.

as i was writing this i noticed that it’s raining heavily outside and our dogs (my beagle chandler and our jackal/tasmanian devil named booba) were crying. of course they were all wet and couldn’t sleep because water was flying all over the place, so i had to go out and rescue them. there i was, braving the onslaught with just an umbrella, trying to work the lock to set them free while rain and dog tongues were lashing at me, getting all wet with rain and dog saliva at 3 in the morning.. and soon as i get them free, them dogs decided that their first act of gratitude would be to crap all over my walkway. all right. now they’re knocking over trash cans and eating garbage. crap.

that’s it, i’m going to bed.

Misis: Sir, mananawagan po sana ako sa mister ko kasi dinala niya ang limang anak namin.
Radio Host: Ok, go ahead!
Misis: Honey, ibalik mo na ang mga bata, isa lang naman ang sa iyo diyan..

yun naman pala..

"You ever heard the story
Of mister faded glory
Say he who rides a pony must someday fall.."

               -"Crown Of Thorns", Mother Love Bone from Mother Love Bone

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2 Responses to ' Nothing Really Matters '

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  1.   Mark said,

    on July 11th, 2006 at 4:32 pm

    dude, naalala mo ba si alexis chan? talamak na recruiter ng herbalife, up arki rin pero nag quit para mag full time sa herbalife. maalala ni trick yun. may balita ka dun? ano na kaya ang nangyari dun? buhay pa ba ang herbalife?

  2.   Epoyz said,

    on July 11th, 2006 at 9:43 pm

    hmmmm… buhay pa yung website, bro, eh.. mahal ng mga beauty products nila, ha? malamang mataas na pwesto nitong si alexis chan kung gayon..

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