EpoyzBlog

a few weeks ago i watched The Exorcism of Emily Rose on dvd with two of my brothers. was browsing the net and i accidentally clicked on their banner, entered the site and i was intrigued so we copped it. see for yourself, enter the site here. it was a good enough movie for me, just kinda like when i got hyped about White Noise when i caught the trailer and it scared the bejeezus out of me. yep, actual recordings of scary shit and all that do it for me, yo. in the White noise site, try to watch the trailer and listen to the actual recordings to get you in the mood.

well, The exorcism… is indeed a lot like White Noise for me, in that the trailer and promotional parade was scarier than the actual film. it’s mainly because both had science and technical aspects as major ingredients in the whole recipe, so it doesn’t go down quite as smooth when you try to really figure out some things. but both of them are okay, i guess.

the reason i’m going on about all these is that both films bother me when i suddenly remember bits of them in the dead of the night, with me living alone and all that. the first few nights after Emily Rose was a bit shaky, i slept with the lights on, and the first two nights i wasn’t able to doze off before 3am. i ain’t that scared, really, it’s just that i can’t help myself from looking at the clock and wait for the second hand to strike the 12dot at 3am and see if it stops right there. i’m also smelling for burning sulfur ( i smelled something bad, but decided it was the fart i let out much earlier, coming back to haunt me…), and the december winds banging on my doors and windows a’int helping anything. dammit.

so i get out of bed and try to watch some tv. it’s just that when i flip the channels and hit a dead station scenes from White Noise come screaming back at me. oh my. all i need now is for the hair at my nape and the back of head to stand on end, remember 6th Sense and i’m set. should i turn off the light and wait for the phone to ring? richard gere was doing that a lot in The Mothman Prophecies and it was just delightful.

but i pulled through after three nights, now things are back to normal. until last night when i woke up suddenly and saw the time at 3am on my bedroom clock. got scared for a little bit right then until i remembered, my clock is 12 minutes fast. hah. if that demon was trying to scare me i sure as hell messed it up for him. ha-ha!

plus, i remembered this technique one of my best buds neil taught me in college: when you’re scared shitless about the supernatural and you’re alone, trying to go to sleep, just try to concentrate on erotic thoughts. that really helps things, and if M. Night still gets to you, just focus on real dirty stuff and you’ll be sleeping in no time. or in need of a cold shower.

The Exorcism of Emily Rose does try to bring an important spiritual message across. it helped that the science camp presented valid points that made their argument solid that kept camp religion on their toes for much of the movie. if only emily rose levitated and that was caught on film, then it would be all over. well, all they got was that audio tape ( which played by itself in laura linney’s apartment at 3am, and all she can say is “Oh my God”.. if that was me i’d be out in the street in no time, screaming hysterically like a little girl and reaching high,piercing notes that only a man being castrated can top…) and it wasn’t good enough evidence. go see the movie for yourself, the “epileptic psychosis” angle is plausible enough that it also made me doubt the authenticity of the possessions that they show on halloween epidodes of Magandang Gabi, Bayan. shit, we once had a maid that had an epileptic episode while cleaning our kitchen floor that when my mom saw her she immediately believed she was being possessed and ran out of our house without any slippers on. that was a real fun day, i remember.

bottomline is, emily rose and father richard was just trying to tell everybody who’s paying attention that them demons and evil spirits are real, the possession was indeed authentic and this in turn will prove that God exists and there for us no matter what. i say Amen to that.

as to the existence of demons and evil spirits, i never had doubts about their existence. heck, i’ve been battling one inside me for as long as i can remember. i figured, maybe the violent possession that emily rose experienced is due to her being a very good person, that the devil inside her was just acting out with all the weird and scary shit, eating bugs and jumping through windows and cursing in latin and shit. for most of us, the demons don’t need no acting up because we give them a steady supply of things to be content with for the meantime. be it trying to get one over another person, tuning out the priest who’s droning on and on at mass,giving that other driver the finger or cutting someone off, ogling at scantily-clad girls at the mall (boys)/ intentionally wearing scandalous garments at the mall to get attention (girls), cheating on your spouse, taking that payoff, giving in to sinful desires… shit, some of us are very much in tune with our personal demons that we don’t know where we end and where it begins. powerful people living the extravagant life off the underprivileged, running the big family business treading on the poor folk that make it run in the first place, corporate types bleeding the comman man dry, leaders and supposed public servants living the life while leading their followers to their imminent demise, greedily reaping the fruits derived from the business of war and death.. well, you get what i mean.

know what? in some of us the devil is just fine where he is, and he doesn’t need no show and fanfare like those demons inside emily rose had. this devil don’t need to jump windows and scratch on walls, he’ll just take that plane to barbados or switzerland or wherever and sleep in that $20,000 a night suite. he don’t need to dine on bugs, filet mignon and lobster thermidore plus the1787 Chateau LaFite will be just fine, thank you. it don’t need to kill the host too, he’s trying to live for as long as he can in this body and prolong this shit that’s going on. yup, everything’s just dandy. how does one exorcise this kind of possession then?

“hey, there’s a look in your eyes
must be love at first sight…”

-”Closer You and I”, Gino Padilla. courtesy of YesFM playing outside my window.

e bakit alam ko yung title?

“Sarrrrap! Yes..FM!”

just like that, Christmas 2005 came and went. we still have the new year to dread or look forward to, depending on your dis/position. oh yes. the pressure that is the holiday season is all but over. believe me, i really love the holidays, i just don’t like the pressure that it puts on me physically, mentally and spiritually. i just get so lost in it all, all the weighing, decision-making, getting in touch with yourself (not touching yourself, you perverts..), trying to give back, guilt trips, pondering, reminiscing, feeling bad for yourself, feeling good about yourself, feeling bad for other people, trying to find something to make you feel good about people in general all over again, trying your best to spread holiday cheer, trying not to get yourself too deep in credit card bills, restraining yourself from getting that new video ipod for yourself, feeling guilty about stuff, how you don’t deserve all the good things you got this year but you keep it anyway, thinking about how much of an ingrate you are, wondering if you let a lot of people down this year, surviving, trying to weather the onslaught of weird crap that comes with the holidays, being hopeful that next year will be better for the country, wondering why the Christmas spirit seemed weak this year and all that.. well, i hope that it’s just me. i’d feel much better for being an idiot and being alone in feeling this way than having my suspicions confirmed that there’s another screwed-up person out there. kung meron, inuman tayo.

i’m usually happiest on the last few days leading up to Christmas eve, at the same time the creeping realization that it’s all going to be over soon brings me back down. oh, well. at least it’s going to be another year of trying to survive and looking forward to wanting to anticipate the next one. i hope next year the spirit will be much stronger, i believe we kinda wasted this year’s holiday cheer and spirit, at least here in the country. medyo mahirap nga talaga this year, sana maayos na itich. bad trip, e. just found out last night about this "No-El" shit and i thought it was a discussion about Christmas. wrong. kagaguhan na naman.

my wish for the new year : for filipinos to stop being indifferent and passive and start stepping up as a people. paunti-unti lang, start inside our home, in our place of work, the way we deal with people we meet on the street everyday, then i think it will be channelled on to bigger things. can’t help but feel that we’re powerless right now because our collective spirit is broken and are  just plain disenchanted about a lot of things. that the enemies of the country know this, that’s why they’re evildoers who can sleep soundly at night. we have to believe that we can do our share and make a difference. otherwise (cue the music…)

"Where have all the good men gone
And where are all the gods?
Where’s the street-wise hercules
To fight the rising odds?
Isn’t there a white knight upon a fiery steed?
Late at night  I toss and turn and dream of what I need…"

          - "Holding Out For A Hero", Laura Branigan

a-che-che.

seriously, we have to believe that we can turn this ship around. it would be a great story if a hero who can rally us to respectability and legitimate hope comes along, but we don’t need another ninoy aquino to die for this cause before we wake up and take the power back. everyday the number of people who don’t trust the next guy down the line is growing. that’s why we hold our head low. that’s why we feel we can’t do anything. why we bend over so they can screw us some more. seems like everyone is just trying his darndest best to survive  and get theirs and secure something for their family, so much so that we are in great danger of ruining the future of this country for our kids. well, i don’t have a kid yet, but i hate to think that me and (future)wifey would need to relocate just to ensure a better future for kiddo. ‘na mean?

maybe it’s because i feel like i’m growing old so fast, that’s why i’m whining and carrying on and on about what’s wrong around me. i just feel so despirited, magnified by this flop of a holiday season. it may be a longshot, but i want to anticipate the coming of Christmas like a kid again. it gets really hard when you see some of the things that’s really hard to swallow, things that break your heart. and i simply hate what i experienced this past year, of just waiting for the holidays to pass. 

pero grabe ang bilis. before you know it, we’re preparing for Christmas 2006 again. yow-za.

"..and the days, days, days
run away like horses over the hills.."

          - "Dirty Day", U2 from Zooropa

one more song for the fucking road:

"There’s a fruitcake for everybody
There’s a fruitcake for everyone
There are b-sides to every story
If you decide to have some fun

Take a bite
It’s alright
There’s some brandy and star margarine to make it bright
Take a bite
It’s alright
A little lovin’ and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake

It’s the season for being happy
But the reason is dead and gone
If the reason for being happy
Takes a backseat when the season’s done

Just take a bite
It’s alright
Taste the taste that sent all mothers giggling in sheer delight
Take a bite
It’s alright
A little lovin and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake

Everybody, everywhere people do you really care
Christmas time has once again arrived
Everybody, everywhere people do you really care
Christmas time has once again arrived

Mistletoe and a little snow
But we don’t get it there at fruitcake heights
Mistletoe and a little snow
But we don’t get it there at fruitcake heights

Stars are falling down from heaven
But it’s nowhere near our town
Miracles are falling down from heaven
But it’s nowhere near our town

There’s a fruitcake in everybody
There’s a fruitcake in everyone
There are b-sides to every story
If you decide to have some fun

Just take a bite
It’s alright
Taste the taste that sent all mothers giggling in sheer delight
Take a bite
It’s alright
A little lovin and some fruit to bake
Life is a piece of cake.

          -"FruitCake", The Eraserheads

here’s to working hard for the new year, everyone.

"Hey, hey, something’s different in my world today
well they changed all my traffic signs to a brighter yellow.."

                             -"Curbside Prophet" , Jason MrAZ

anyone notice that whenever you work harder at something, the more you’re bound to mess things up? the more you realize how hard you’re working, the reward/results you get doesn’t seem to add up? that outside factors just seem to get through the smallest of seams and you end up working harder than ever? been going through this feeling a whole lot lately, and it just plain sucks ass. but i know i don’t have the right to complain about anything, and i reasoned maybe this is happening because there’s a lesson in there somewhere, some shit like that, and i deserve all these because there were a lot of times that i slacked off and got away with more than i rightfully deserve. so there. knowing i can’t bitch and moan, i blogged.

gotta stay positive, everyone. there’s a joke in there somewhere, and laughter is on its way.

included among the GQ men of the year (the issue with that jen cover) is steve nash, the 2005 nba MVP. i loved the article that came with it, how this regular guy won it over the rest of the league. in the midst of all the argument if he deserved the award or not, here’s my take: this most improbable of MVPs is the most deserving awardee in the EpoyzBook. watch him play and you’ll understand. i’d show tapes of his play to kids instead of slam dunk highlight reels. the way he carries a team is just beautiful. and he’s currently proving the haters wrong. AND he still stays humble while humbling all them fuckers. validay-zhun, bitchaz.

and knowing dude from way back, i just know he didn’t enjoy that photo shoot. i read somewhere that he only has two pairs of jeans and almost always just wears jeans and t-shirts. this while he was apparently dating liz hurley. did you know that SLAM wrote an article on him and ran a closeup photo of him with a booger hanging down his nose? they all got a good laugh out of it.

they never finished taping the 3rd season, but they’ll be showing some of it anyway. yep, chappelle’s show will be back.

aaaaaand we’re SEAGames Champions again. i have to admit that i had doubts that we’ll do good in the games. good thing i was wrong, and the athletes played their hearts out for us. playing in front of countrymen, friends and family really boosted their performance. i salute all the filipinos who made this possible. we salute you and we glorify you for doing this improbable achivement. never mind the gloria-fying, just tell her to fuck off.

just hated how abs-cbn lapped up the popularity of orange and lemons’ "pinoy ako" during the games to further promote their ongoing pinoy big brother hullabaloo and shit. yech.

just finished watching The Grinch and marveled how jim carrey’s performance still makes me laugh out loud. i say this is the most tailored-fit part for jim ever.

if things aren’t working out for me basketball-wise, at least the wolves are getting on the same page and runnin’ it like it was 2003. way to go, KG. oh, and they won again today, beating the lakers at home to stay unbeaten in december. i hope i didn’t jinx it.

if i’m not making sense a lot more than usual, it’s because i’m going crazy over listening to YesFM. see, my room is right beside the work area of our shop, and i wake up every damn morning to blaring jokes and jingles and freaking covers of rehashed-to-death songs. of course i can’t make the boys turn down their music and station of choice, i think those three have a union or something. i can’t risk a CBA renegotiation now. so for the meantime i have to endure the endless "mula nang makilala ka ako ay napaakit mo…" every 2 songs or so (they also make different "artists" soup this up and belt their own skin-crawling versions..imagine janno gibbs and ogie alcasid doing it if you haven’t heard), and the injected joke time in between. want a sample? " ’sabi ng madre kay padre matapos silang magtalik: father, paano po pag nabuntis ako?’ padre:’ bahala na ang nasa taas..’  pedro:’ hoy, wala akong kinalaman jan, nanonood lang ako…’". ok, ok, i sort of like some of the jokes, maybe 1 out of 10 that they dish out. but when you catch yourself humming their fucking annoying jingle  in the elevator or while browsing at powerbooks, you just know something is seriously wrong with you. feels like radiation poisoning or something. maybe one of these days i’ll get up from bed, head straight to their area, pick up a steel bar and beat the crap out of that fucking stereo. if i go crazy enough i swear i will do it. if i catch myself singing that Hale song again i just might need to end all this. i may just have to convice them that i was sleepwalking.

speaking of cra-zy..

"In a heaven of people there’s only some want to fly
Isn’t that crazy?"

         -"Crazy", Seal

that’s crazy.

crazy.