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spirit of ‘79

August 30th, 2005 by epoyz

one is the loneliest number. let me just say.

glo’s probably thinking that this impeachment thing is a bitch. just won’t go away. was flipping through the channels and i caught this  "staged" walkout. the opposition congressmen are hopeful they’ll get to the magic number (79), so good luck.. just so tired of all these.

but the award for bitch of the week goes to katrina. check out the slideshow  of what she left at her wake. one mean rabble-rouser, that one. hope our homies there at N.O. are fine, along with all the folks that were evacuated to avoid all the strong winds and flooding.

back here at home, looks like we’re gonna be drowning soon enough, and there won’t be any evacuation or rescue operations that can help us. bring it on, you morons. with the rapid increase in gas prices (which takes along every other commodity with it..) and the government program that jacks the prices up with more taxes, progress and stability will be closer.. to the crapper.

but (butt), it says here that the economy is actually growing. word? it’s growing something, that’s fa ’sho. a tumor, perhaps?

chot reyes has been my second-least favorite coach , but at least his dedication and effort impresses me. i see good things with this rp team pool of his. apparently, so does he, so.. it just doesn’t feel right that they included asi taulava in the team. he-is-not-fi-li-pi-no.. i’m just saying this because if we win something, it’s gonna be tainted. and we don’t want that.

minnesota’s a long shot in wrestling mike finley away from miami, so i was rather hoping they’d snag nick van exel. well, that ain’t happening, too.

well, our kabayan(!) ( if you don’t know, you should..) mig is still doing well, and it certainly looks like INXS is feeling him a lot lately. i thought he was gonna bomb out last week, singing his own song, but the old geezers went for it. well, let’s find out more tomorrow. i strongly think he is one of the three strongest people to win it all. and i still think j.d.’s a dick and he should have been out before deanna.

if you missed memento when it was being shown, you should go see it.. download it or something. never seen anything like it. it’s all fucked up, but in a good way. word. christopher nolan is really good.

…aaaaand, i’m officially back. still dealing with this depression thing, so.. might as well keep blogging.

anyways, here’s a good game if you want to practice control. or if you want to lose your mind and bang your keyboard.

"…You woke up this morning
    Got yourself a gun,
    Your mama always said you’d be
    The Chosen One.

    She said: You’re one in a million
    You’ve got to burn to shine,
    But you were born under a bad sign,
    With a blue moon in your eyes…"

"…Woke up this morning
    Got yourself a gun
    Got yourself a gun
    Got yourself a gun…"

          - "Woke Up This Morning", Alabama 3 from "The Sopranos" soundtrack

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this one doesn’t count

August 16th, 2005 by epoyz

          didn’t have the inclination to talk about stuff lately. and i seem to have lost the strength to even complain. have been lethargic the past few weeks, my gloomy disposition seemed to coincide with the incessant rain. even my peripheral vision seemed to have shrunk, or at least i believe that the darkness within and around me seemed to have cut into it a little bit.  now my view is of a constant focused recording in 4:3 aspect ratio of what  life would be if i fail to find what made it good for me again. but i know the rain will stop, the basketball courts will be dry again and precious rays of sunshine will lift my mood. time will pass, seasons will change and things will work out. everything is temporary, even loneliness. surviving  one day at a time seems promising enough. build your strength and see what happens. put in the work and things might take care of themselves. if they don’t, well…

          it’s not faith if it’s guaranteed.

          lately i’ve been singing this in my head:

I walk a lonely road
The only one that I have ever known
Don’t know where it goes
But it’s home to me and I walk alone

I walk this empty street
On the Boulevard of Broken Dreams
Where the city sleeps
and I’m the only one and I walk alone

I walk alone
I walk alone

    - Green Day

          someone said that a journey of a thousand leagues begins with the first few steps. i took this to heart when i began my own journey, but he never said how lonely it would be.

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dog years

August 5th, 2005 by epoyz

     exchanged text messages with this guy last wednesday regarding my boy, chandler the beagle. apparently he visited our shop, saw my dog and was interested in "stud services". he was asking me how i much i charge for stud fees and all that. see, apart from being ignorant about this practice ( i’m no breeder and i know squat about these things..) i was really taken aback because i wasn’t really prepared to hear that chandler is all grown up and ready to, uhm, spread his seeds. the man said his beagle was in heat and if we agree on something he and his girl-dog will be coming around this saturday. turns out chandler’s "dance partner" is an older gal and has experience to boot.

     now i have an idea why the phrase " lucky dog " was invented.

i’m looking at chandler now, wondering if he’ll be up to the task, because he’s only one-and-a-half. he’s just looking up at me, alarmed that i’m staring at him, so he gives me this look like he’s saying, "what’s up with you, dog?".. i’m more inclined to think that he has no idea that his life is going to change tomorrow, and barring any glitches he will become a father at a very young age.

     now, back to the negotiation of this "stud fee" the guy keeps telling me.

only, there never was any actual negotiation. apart from my ineptitude and being unprepared to hear that my boy is all grown up, i just thought: hey, if you’re gonna let my dog score on your dog and you’ll pay me on top of that, i absolutely have no problem with the whole thing. so i told the guy to just give me an offer and i’ll take it, just give me whatever he thinks is fair. he just asked if chandler is registered, told him yes, asked how old he is, i said one and a half. the last question he threw my way caught me offguard again: is he proven?

     proven? proven?

     i’ll admit i was a bit offended, because i wanted to answer "pimp, my dog will impregnate the hell out of your bitch, and your cat, too.  word up."

     with just a bit of jab at my pride for my boy, i answered : "well, it’s going to be his first time doing this." i don’t know exactly what to feel at that moment when i gave my answer. are they going to back out now? i really have no problem if they do, it’s just that i felt a bit bad for my dog at the prospect of being rejected. turns out they weren’t backing out. being "unproven" just affects the stud fee bar, with him having no "hits" on his rap sheet. told him i won’t be demanding compensation anyway until he’s sure that chandler successfully plants his seeds, so he went and offered us a thousand bucks. not really sure if the guy’s stiffing me or what, but feeling the way that i feel about the whole thing, i agreed.

     so. my boy’s all grown up. i’m a bit excited for him. tomorrow he’s going to hide the salami. he’s stuffing the thanksgiving turkey. he’s gonna take the log to the beaver. he’s gonna be putting the hotdog in the bun. he’s putting the breadstick in the oven. put the jelly filling in the donut. sorry about that. if you watched "grumpy old men" you’ll notice that i got those from burgess meredith.

     i hope chandler is big enough to mount the older lady-dog, i’d hate it if he encounters a mismatch like this one.

     jen finally breaks her silence about brad. used to be on brad’s side on this because i’ve been hearing that she’s the one who isn’t keen on starting a family. pitt, you bastard. i specifically told you that if you break her heart i’ll hunt you down like the dog you are and kick your ass. aherm.. lost it for a while there.

     and in the nba, the biggest, most complicated trade in history just went down. i wasn’t aware that trades can get as complicated as this, now i’m not even attempting to understand how they balanced the whole thing out.

     in china, an exhibition match between the chinese men’s basketball team and puerto rico’s contingent turned into an ugly brawl. good thing no one threw a tea cup or a hot dumpling or something.

     and, according to charlie murphy, there won’t be a third season of the chappelle show on tv. come on guys, say it ain’t so.

     sad to hear about willie green’s injury, which happened before he was set to sign a big extension deal. to think, if there wasn’t a moratorium on the free agent signings, the deal would’ve come through. i just wish he just waited until the contracts are signed, like his teammate ashton kutcher who played tennis instead, but we never really know what will happen, do we? he probably got injured for wanting himself to get better prepared for next season, and life threw him a curve ball. i hope he comes all the way back.

     mig ayesa will still be rocking on in rockstar:inxs, while tara got the boot. i think he’s strong enough to be in the final four.

     well, have a great weekend, kids.

     " in my dream i was drowning my sorrows, but my sorrows they learned to swim.."

          - "Until The End of the World" , U2 from Achtung Baby

     damn.

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tuesday takeout

August 2nd, 2005 by epoyz

the 6th harry potter book came out, but before i got to it i had to do the 5th book again because i can’t remember what happened at the end of that one. all i can recall is how a pain in the ass the 15-year-old harry potter has become, with his temper and all the shouting he’s doing in that order of the phoenix joint. so i have been reading harry potter for the last three weeks (i can’t finish books in just a few sittings, i only manage to read a few chapters before i start getting dizzy from all the reading… i don’t know, must be a problem with my eyes or something..) and it’s manifesting some weird effects. i’ve been dreaming a lot that i am in the pensieve, seeing all kinds of weird shit, or i’m watching the new harry potter movie while i’m IN the movie.. man, i have to finish this book quick so that i can have normal dreams again (like the ones where i keep dunking on people’s heads in the nba..). my normal crazy dreams.

ahh, the nba.. with the new collecting bargaining agreement, players get a larger share of the pie. the salary cap is up by over 5 million dollars, so even bumbling duds get paid with a lot of guaranteed money. charles barkley is still hating on his mama for having him too early…

man, oh man.. getting paid (a lot) doing what you love to do. must be a very sweet deal..

no hard-hitting news about what’s happening in pilippins my pilippins lately, or at least maybe i’m starting not to care anymore. there’s some shit about a president’s aide willing to testify about sumthin’-sumthin’.. it’s a complicated assembly machine that churns off more confusion, this intricate game our leaders play. i think things will stay relatively the same, unless something major blows up and messes everybody’s game plan. still waiting for an "all-bets-are-off" event. right now, i don’t see anything coming.

switch on.

acheng, malufit pala yung the buzz nung sunday. sayang, di ko natiyempuhan. ok talaga pag involved si lolit solis. sana magkabatuhan ng tsinelas.

switch off.

saw "the wedding crashers" last week, ok sana kaso masyadong mahaba, and, bad trip kasi andaming cut. ginawa ba namang pg-13. kainich. mga hangal.

we’ll, i’m off to finish book 6. i need to finish this now, because last night i had this dream sequence where i’m shooting jumpshots over voldemort. yup. i was there, doing shooting drills and he-who-must-not-be-named was checking me, talking trash. after that i dressed up to go see the goblet of fire, and the theater lobby ’s ceiling was like the great hall’s, with all the sky effect and shit. yeah, sometimes i mix it up like that.

I’m breaking through
I’m bending spoons
I’m keeping flowers in full bloom
I’m looking for answers from the great beyond.

- "The Great Beyond", R.E.M.

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